Who’s on your SQUAD?



Best-selling author, publisher, motivational speaker and educator.

MEET dr. adair


July 25, 2019

This morning I was on social media (I’m on there all the time…Lol!) and read an interesting post written by a very close friend of mine. And then another very close friend responded. The two engaged a couple of times, and then another person chimed in. When she chimed in, however, it didn’t present as neutral – It presented as negative.


I felt the need to invite myself into this “conversation” to speak up for one of my friends because I believed that this third party questioned her character and integrity.

I had her back.

My friend sent me a personal message and thanked me for my support and then posted a clear and positive message to the third party.

I stopped following the thread after that since she was awake and able to speak for herself.

That exchange this morning led me to ask these questions:

Who speaks for you?

Who’s on your squad?

I want you to remember that everyone who is sitting on your front row doesn’t mean that they are fully supporting you.

Everyone riding with you ain’t necessarily riding for you so don’t be fooled by folks who masquerade as your friend.

It’s a hard lesson to learn, and sometimes we spend years investing in relationships only to discover that they haven’t been authentic all along.

Sometimes our hearts are shattered and our spirits are broken when we realize that the people we thought were working in our favor were actually just using us for our favor.

And yes, some people will love, support, and friend you the best way they know how.

But it’s still up to you to determine if it’s the kind of love, support, and friendship that you need.

And, that you deserve.

I know that I am a loyal friend.

And I know that I friend hard.

But I’ve learned the hard way that I can’t be all things to all people all the time because they don’t deserve it.

And some don’t deserve to be on my squad anymore.

Begin to surround yourself with people who bask in the sunlight with you and not try to steal the sunshine from you.

Choose friends who will listen to you and not just hear the words you are saying.

Only allow people in your personal space who have earned the right to be there.

Those who have shown you loyalty, respect, and dependability.

Not those individuals who claimed to support you but then never really show up when you need them.

You are an amazing person.

You are already equipped and empowered to stand in your truth, persevere in the pursuit of your passion, and be victorious in your vision of your future.

And you deserve a squad who really has your back.

Lesson: Start to remove people from your life who really don’t support you, won’t speak up for you and won’t have your back. You don’t need them. Sometimes it’s your own family. And you have to release them too. Although you can’t change your family, you can change your relationship with them. It’s time that you filled your squad with people who can give you what you need and take up for you, even when you’re not there. You deserve it.

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